What’s in a Name?

Anxiety gives me anxiety.
The very word

Grabs you by the horns,
Wrangles you into submission.

A moth with black
Horsehair wings,

The flutter of a heartbeat,
Once static,
Now a deep sea tremor.

Anxiety,
Printed bold on the bow
Of a ship.

She is an empty vessel,
Her head
Just above the waterline.

Poe’s golden bug:
Once bitten,
Forever shy.

To itch
An old wound.

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Purgatory

But it’s that lovely day today,
Sorry for the inconvenience
Sorry for the inconvenience and
Sorry for the inconvenience caused.

I’m not going to be so utterly mesmerised,
Sorry for the delay,
Sorry for the inconvenience
Sorry for the inconvenience caused.

 

[Created using Android’s predictive text system.]

hanker

salt beef on a
plain bagel,

hot mustard,
damp pickles,
I barely tasted
any of it.

the beef was tough,
the mustard stung
my fingers,
I wanted to cry some more
but didn’t have it
in me.

fuck the diet,
I want carbs.
I want fat and salty
ruin.
I want my veins
to pump syrup
until that sugar coma
hits hard,
hits home
and then keeps on
throwing punches.

salt beef
that refused to shred
between my teeth,
mustard that stained
my shirt.
a faint heat that
threatened to distract me
for one sumptuous
moment
but could not work its magic
on my coward soul.